just like old times

Welcome back, 'ku believers! It's me, The Haiku Master, just returned from a trip to the local Piggly Wiggly, and you'll never guess who I ran into -- my sometime ally and sometime foe, Old Man Winter!

The Haiku Master (Left) And Old Man Winter (Right) Both Love Shopping At Piggly Wiggly

"Haiku Master! Hey, Haiku Master!" he shouted as we crossed paths in the dairy aisle. "It's me Haiku Master, Old Man Winter! Remember me?"

"Of course I remember you!" I replied, clapping him gladly on the shoulder. "How've you been, old soul?"

"Eh, as well as can be expected. You know, what with me being old and all. But hey, Haiku Master! My name's not Old Soul! It's Old Man Winter!"

"Yes, of course it is. So, anything new?"

"Yeah, there sure is -- I got married, Haiku Master! Whaddya think of that?"

"That's fantastic! Is the blushing bride here?"

"Nah."

"Oh, at home then?"

"Nah."

"Uh... alright then. Where is she?"

"Oh, she's dead. I froze her to death, Haiku Master! I froze my little buttercup right to death!"

"That... that's tragic, man! I don't know what to say."

"Eh, don't worry about it. I'd gone off my meds for a bit, and you know how I get when I'm off my meds."

"Don't I ever."

"Well okay, Haiku Master! It was good seeing you!"

"Likewise, old friend."

"No, Haiku Master, you got it all wrong again! It's Old Man Winter! See? Old Man Winter!"

"Right you are. Don't be a stranger now, hear?"

"You betcha, Haiku Master! Catch you later!"

Old Man Winter walked off, leaving me to finish my shopping. Sure was nice seeing the guy. Too bad about his wife, but then, any woman who marries Old Man Winter kind of gets what she has coming.

Best,

there can be only one

Sweet Criminy, 'ku believers! It's me, The Haiku Master, and you're never going to believe this: I just ran into my Mirror Universe counterpart while shopping for a Festivus Ham down at the local Piggly Wiggly!

The Devil you say, you say? Take a look at this shocking photo, taken by a Piggly Wiggly security camera not one hour ago!

This Cheap Knock-Off Of The Haiku Master Bears All The Earmarks Of A Mirror Universe Native

See the evil, grinning leer? The goatee?! The tracksuit?!? If that's not a Mirror Universe The Haiku Master, I don't know what is! Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to confirm my suspicions. He was standing near the exit when I spotted him, and took off as soon as we made eye contact. Being next in line at the checkout, I was unable to give chase for fear I'd lose my spot -- or worse yet, that the toothless old woman behind me would snap up my Festivus Ham.

Still, the store manager was nice enough to give me a print-out of the above picture, which I'll certainly be adding to my investigative files. In the meantime, if you see this creep, do not try to apprehend him on your own. Just call the pros at Haiku International, and we'll take care of the rest.

Best,