final hunt for the pygmy gorilla, pt. I

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CHAPTER I

Greetings, friends. It is I, The Haiku Master, back with another awe-inspiring tale of roughneck adventure culled directly from my singular life!

As the hepper amongst you already know, the greatest comic book series of all time -- Grimjack -- is back after a 15-year, lawyer-caused hiatus. I was at my top secret base of operations in the Baltimore suburbs, re-reading the first new issue for the sixth time when the phone rang.

“The Haiku Master residence,” I said, suavely. “The Haiku Master speaking.”

“H.M.,” said the gravelly voice on the other end of the line, sounding haunted. “It’s me... Joe.”

“Aw, Jesus -- not you!” I said. “It can’t be you. You’re dead! You were on the Intruders’ saucer when it exploded! Game over, man! Game over!”

“On the contrary, old friend, the game has only just begun,” Joe said. “It’s me alright -- though I wish to god it weren’t! The world’s in danger, H.M., terrible danger...”

“What danger, you bearded fool? What are you talking about?”

“The gorilla,” he said. “The damn, dirty pygmy gorilla! I was wrong about it, so wrong...and now the world's going to pay!”

“Alright, now slow down and take a deep breath -- what does the pygmy gorilla have to do with...”

“There’s no time,” he cried, “no time! This threat has to be nipped in the bud... and I’m putting the Adventure Team back together to do the nipping!”

“But how does that concern me? I was never even on the Adventure Team -- that was my sensei, Charles Bukowski.”

“Well then let’s hope you’ve got the feet to fill his sandals, H.M., 'cause I'm gonna need all the kung fu grips and eagle eyes I can get my hands on! I expect you at Headquarters by Friday, mister -- all for one and one for all!”

With a click, the line went dead. “Yeah, yeah, all for one and one for all, you dirty commie,” I muttered.

Well, this is certainly going to blow my weekend, loyal readers. But when the Adventure Team calls, one answers.

"Yes," I said, now speaking with a hot-sounding airline representative. "This is The Haiku Master. I'm going to need one ticket to Singapore, please."

---CLICK HERE FOR 'FINAL HUNT FOR THE PYGMY GORILLA' PT. II---