man oh man do i ever love mayonnaise

Guess what, friends? No, seriously, guess. Okay, okay, I, The Haiku Master, shall tell you -- I've signed another lucrative endorsement deal, this time with the American Association of Mayonnaise Manufacturers (AAMM)!

Mayonnaise: The Only Condiment Endorsed By The Haiku Master

That's right! You won't catch me wasting time with ketchup, mustard, relish, soy sauce, syrup, jelly, marinara, french onion dip, tabasco, or any other second-rate spread. No, when the Pharaoh of 5-7-5 needs a topping, he goes straight to the source -- Mayonnaise: The Official Condiment Of The Haiku Master!

Then again, why wait 'til you need a condiment; that sweet, sweet mayonnaise is also great straight out of the jar! I mean, Mao Tse-Tung? More like Mayo Tse-Tung if you ask me!

So remember, kids -- if you want to be as cool as The Haiku Master, you gotta eat your mayonnaise. Ask for it by name!

Best,