i hate sharing

Hi folks. It's me, The Haiku Master, but I must warn you I'm a little nonplussed this morning... because TIME Magazine decided to split its Person of the Year honor amongst myself, Bono, and Bill Gates, rather than just giving it to me outright!!!

Just When TIME Magazine Seemed Headed In The Right Direction, They Have To Pull A Boneheaded Stunt Like This

I mean, "Persons" of the Year? "Persons?" That cover should read Man of the Year, and it should be graced with my mug and my mug alone! To add insult to injury, I'm not even sure who the other two are! When we met yesterday for our photo shoot, that Gates character struck me as the type who probably manages a Radio Shack, while the mononymic Bono just muttered a lot and refused to take off his sunglasses. Persons of the Year material? I think not!

And they have the gall to make a respected crimefighter like the Sultan of Syllables stand behind those yahoos?! The nerve!

Ah well. Even with a three-way tie, this high-profile international exposure is sure to increase my fan club membership levels, so I suppose I should look at the glass as half-full, rather than half-empty. And speaking of the ol' fan club, if you're a current member your annual dues must be received by January 1, as always. Don't be late!

Best,