Wednesday, August 17, 2005

draft walken

Mahalo, friends! It's me, The Haiku Master, with some bad news -- legendary thespian Christopher Walken isn't running for President after all, despite the recent appearance of a Walken 2008 website!

Yesterday, Walken decried the site -- www.walken2008.com -- as a hoax, and promised to utterly destroy the giggling twits who created it... as well as their family, friends and acquaintances! Not in so many words, but with a man like Walken, you have to read between the lines.

Regardless, I feel Mr. Walken is exactly the kind of leadership this country needs in such troubled times. To be honest, I don't know much about his political views, but I do know I like his movies. And that's good enough for me. Which is why I'm stealing a page from 2004's turbulent campaign, and announcing the immediate formation of the Draft Christopher Walken Foundation!


This Country Has A Fever, And The Only Prescription Is President Christopher Walken

More details to follow as they become available, but in the meantime, feel free to start sending me your presumably tax-deductible donations to Walken's war chest!

Best,

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Haiku Master,

I would like to apologize for my recent comments towards your friend, Captain Walrus. While I view him as nothing less than a murderer, I respect your wishes and shall refrain from name calling on your website.

It is ashame that Mr. Walken is not running, afterall. However, there is another candidate worth checking out... I encourage you to do so. Saddam Garcia! (http://www.myspace.com/crazyfingerscreations)

Also, I'm sure you've heard by now... Captain Walrus is now officially being investigated. I feel it's my duty to let you know that tomorrows edition of the National Enquirer will include a detailed story about an apparent love affair between you and Scott Peterson in the months before Lacey Peterson's death.

You can find the cover of the issue on my blog or by going here

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v84/thebigjig/nationalenquirer.jpg

Unknown said...

Hey, there's always Jimmy Hoffa for President. A guy doesn't need to have a live brain to be president these days. Just one dog's observation there . . .

Cal